Song for the Moment

Your mercy found me upon the broken road
Lifted me beyond my failing
Into your glory
My sin and shame dissolved
And now forever Yours
I'll stand

In love never to end
To call You more than Lord
Glorious Friend

So I throw my life upon all that You are
Cause I know You gave it all for me
And when all else fades
My soul will dance with You
Where Love lasts forever

***

Ever had a prayer that cannot be put into words? Thank GOD for this anointed song that pretty much says what I want to do every second of my life.

Of Deep Fried Mars Bars, Snowies and PJs

So it was one of those Saturdays when you were just aching to get out of the house coz you’re almost finished with the laundry and your abode is now sparkling clean.

And then you got a call from a friend saying that she's craving for some Deep Fried Mars Bar at Bondi; all you have to do is rock up with your cardigan and an empty stomach that can handle all that sugar.

It was also one of them Fridays when Pajama Nites with golden lessons about Faith Consistency that seem to be the clincher for your totally hectic week.

Oh yea…not to mention a three day trip up the snow where it doesn’t matter whether you’ll be freezing your bum over a 6-hour drive or fall face flat from your toboggan coz you were such a newbie when it comes to grappling that rope for brakes.

God is really good. These are just some moments that all I can ever do is look back and pinch my self for all those times when I complain about my life being sooo boring down under.

And with these, I give You, my ABBA, all of my praise.

Letting Go

Whilst you might have stumbled across this post thinking that this write up for you, rest assured, this is actually a preaching to myself. Which I do everyday. Every. Freaking. Day.

A few months ago, our church hosted an overnight family camp that encouraged people to encounter GOD in their life. The place was incredibly nestled between mountains, and trees and cliffs and valleys that would make you wonder how the heck did the constructions workers made their way to even finish the cabins designed.

Along with the camp were a few activities that you can do for fun. Rock Climbing. Canoeing. Bush Hiking and my all time favourite; the Flying Fox.

Flying fox is an outdoor activity where you will jump from one side of a river to another. You will be tied into a rope with harnesses and all the other knick knacks where you will literally make your way to the other side of the river with a single rope hanging above you.

O well, I’m really bad at explaining things so just have a look at how scary it is:

Ok, that was me before the jump. Haha.

But if there is one thing that GOD has taught me during this activity, it is this lesson that has been in my vocabulary for the past month.

Just let go.

I wish that I could do that as easily as I have done in the Flying Fox, but everyday is like a massive lecture day from the Lord on how I should (and could) let go if I really want to. Coz when I do, it wouldn’t be so hard for me to go on the other side of pain. I will be able to move on. I will be invincible. I will be able to laugh precariously again. I will be able to look back and smile in spite of it all.

But then again, being the complicated girl that I am, I still have to be reminded about these simple truths:

Letting go is far beyond being apathetic of the people that has literally crushed your heart. It is more of accepting the events that GOD has so masterfully orchestrated in your life because HE knows (I repeat, HE KNOWS) that His glory will be revealed all the more.

Letting go is far beyond burying good/bad memories of certain events, wishing that you can be like Dory or better yet, have selective amnesia. It is being at peace knowing that Jesus, Your Father, Saviour, and Lover has got you in HIS hands. His all powerful, all protecting, all knowing hands.

So that was what I have been trying to do for a few days now. Somehow, I am reenacting the seconds when I was doing the flying fox in an attempt to apply them in my life.

And heck yes, I am making this bold and signifying decision.

I will let go.

“But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus”.

-Phillippians 3:13-14

Name Ponderings

I wish I could be like SpiderMan, SuperMan, or even Betty La Fea*.

At least these people can live up to their name.

But whenever I see my own: AGAPE LOVELLE, the me gets the chills.

I mean, Lovelle wouldn’t be so hard, would it. Toss in whatever L.O.V.E I’ve got in my heart cupboard and it should be alright. But to my despair and incessant excitement, AGAPE is still in included in my birth certificate.

AGAPE: the love of GOD or Christ for mankind,

selfless love of one person for another,

a religious meal shared as a sign of love and fellowship.

Great.

Love of God. Unconditional. Everlasting. Does not keep a record of wrongs. And it’s permanently identified in my name. Talk about pressure really.

And imagine the grief that pierced my shattered heart when I came across this command as I was doing my “wow time” with Jesus last night.

“Let love be without hypocrisy”

- Romans 12:9

One sentence did it all.

Because right now, it is extremely hard for me to love. Not just the touchy feely and mushy one but just love to the full extent of what Jesus is feeling for us. Family and friends are still irreplaceable in my life but honestly, it seems like all the feelings are already exhausted from my heart and all that it is doing right now is just pumping blood.

It died.

Together with all the ramifications and grief and hope that somehow, it will be revived. Together with all my sparkle and glittering excitement to reach out to people and get to know them. Together with all the passion to share my all and pour out my resources to everyone within my reach. Together with all my dreams and desires to belong to someone.

But then again, I know that my GOD is in the process of resuscitating my heart. In the midst of this transition, I know that His love will overpower my past. His AGAPE love will take over my feeble being. His immense grace will transform this soul and cleanse my life.

And maybe,

I will be able to live up to my name again, somehow.

Testing

Lest I be accused of invading the cyberspace of my very own self, I have decided to consolidate updates of this so called existence into one site that sums up the real me.

AgapeLovelleReyes

But really, this site is nothing about me, more than anything else, all I want to happen is for Lovelle to disappear and be replaced by this girl that is effervescently attuned to her Saviour's cheers.

Less of me. More of HIM.

So today marks my online journey.

Thanks for hopping in.